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Rytha Rytha Lew Chiu Min 劉秋敏 21/06/1994 lionheaddragonclaw@hotmail.com Nan Chiau Primary School(graduated) Peicai Secondary School 4F '10 Female Past Interact Club President NCC(Sea) Staff Sergeant Kayaker Adidas Lover [In my world, take backs only happen once.] [You found my blog? Good, that means you know where you stand.] |
I have a mouth for a reason
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| a monster that make boys cry | |
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Sunday, July 11, 2010 10:45 PM
What am I supposed to feel now? I don't know. Am I supposed to feel, yay, it's not going to cause any more problems? Or am I suppose to feel, shit, it's not going to make anyone happy? Well, I don't know, but I don't want to feel any pain right now, so I'm just going to feel absolutely nothing. Or at least pretend I don't feel anything.Well, had kayaking today, around Sembawang again. I should really get out of the area for awhile, before I get too attached to the place. I'm going to promanade to kayak soon for the opening of the marina whatever. And I'm so going to enjoy myself. My urge to do anything has been lost, my will to sleep is gone as insomnia struck, I should have drunk that vodka. I worry, yet I myself am stuck in an emotional shitty position. I always want people to be happy, so is that why I can't stop smiling when I'm still so messed up inside? I've lost the urge for food already, I'm losing a lot more weight than I should be. Taking a lot of things up these few days, and challenging myself, will I still be doing well in school? My brain is mixed, my feelings are pissed, my arms are so willing to punch things right now, just wishing I could find a punching bag. If I'm still awake later at 2.30, I'll be up watching the world cup. And the person I'd blame for giving me insomnia isn't Jevons le, it's pancake head! And if I really do stay awake, next week, I'M SO GONNA TAU POK HIM! And I just remember I have a test tomorrow. Crap. Nevermind. I had my exercise and I'm happy enough. Hope Hanson is feeling better after today. AND HOLLAND BETTER WIN. OR I'M KILLING SOMEONE TOMORROW IN SCHOOL. BET WITH ME I WILL! After I raise the flag and change out of my uniform. And show off my damn nice arm muscles:D I'll just get some sleep tonight, I guess. Bring me to sleep. I'm so going to need the sleep, before the insomnia leads through the week. I feel pissed. And I'm so eating a lot of crap tomorrow. |
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